May 10th, 2003

Not now.

If there is a God, he was treating me like a marionette today.

Yesterday, to be polite, was nothing short of a waste of 24 hours for me. Nothing of greatness occured, and I'm quite frankly not in a position to want to remember the day. Pretty much everything revolved around being put to the test. One thing I have learned is with work and with Mum ill I need more time for me. With me being on AIM so much it means a lot of my time is devoted to talking to others. Which is all well and good, but not if you're not being selfish as well, like I need to be.

So, now I've had AIM open for a few days non-stop, I might just shut the program down for a few days and see what happens. I'll probably miss a few people. I'll also probably end up opening the program back up again really soon. But basically, as I've typed this up I've got four IM windows up and a chatroom open, and this is a fairly mild night in terms of people messaging me. I can't deal with this, along with all the chores and such.

I'll still type up on here every so often, as I usually do. But I keep mumbling about how I've these games sitting here not being completed, and the best way of stopping that mumbling is to sod off away from people for a bit and actually complete them. Inbetween the shouts of making tea for Mum.
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    aggravated
Enfieldean

Well, that's a novel way to be woken up.

Having "HARRY! HARRY!" screamed at you.

Mum had decided to let Harry go outside this morning and let me and Cliff have a slight lay-in this morning, Harry was pestering to go to toilet a little earlier than usual. And indeed he did go. The problem was when he saw an Alsatian on the other side of the road and disappeared from Mum's point of view. I woke up, had clothes on and had dashed out the door before I actually woke up, and realised there were several routes Harry could have gone.

Long story short, a twenty minute goose chase followed, and as I eventually found Harry, who'd gone for a walk around the block, he looked at me with "Oh, you're here at last; walk me home then" eyes.

Needless to say, my body isn't pleased with me being up at 8. But why not make the best of it and keep myself awake? It'll mean I should fall asleep at a saner hour, and changing my warped body clock back to something verging on regular can only be a good thing.

So, my reward for being woken up so early will be a nice bath. Then I'll start on making a CD up, potentially ordering some of those extravagances, and generally getting ready for work at two this afternoon.

On reflection, I know why I wanted away from AIM for a bit. I think too many people were turning to me for things I couldn't offer - which was cutting into my time; making me feel a little inadequate and generally not making chatting to people an enjoyable experience. I've also always appreciated pleases and thank yous if I do try to help, and at times I wasn't getting those magic words. Being taken for granted? Perhaps I was.

Still, being away hasn't exactly resulted in me having loads of work done yet. Yesterday I had a blast at Burnout 2 simply because I needed a no-brainer arcade racing game to get my mind focused. Tonight I think I'll watch a DVD. Oh, and the Golden Sun case is on its way, Jess. Hope it gets there for Monday, I just put a few random stamps on the front so I've no idea if I've paid enough for first or second class.

So, yes. Bath. While I yawn my head off... meh, maybe one hour more of sleep is necessary.
Ickle Cute Thing

Retail therapy.

I did indeed end up ordering Advance Wars 2 from dvdboxoffice.com and that MP3/VCD player from specialreserve.co.uk, so that's some cash gone from my account. I think I had that Jonathan Creek DVD boxset pre-ordered from Play too, so that's gonna be another dent in my account. Right now I'm financially happy though, so all of this is good.

Next thing to consider, work. Apparently the manager's going away for a holiday in five weeks and the shop owner may not be around because his wife is expecting a child around the same time and he wants to be there for her. From what the manager has showed me today, he's expecting me to be the one who is to be given the lion's share of responsbility for the shop over this period when neither manager will . This is going to make the next five weeks very interesting, because I sense a feeling of being thrown in a proverbial deep end here.

I need to finish making the music CD up; to listen to tomorrow during work. And I need to think about a few things I talked to Astrid about... honesty can be quite a pain at times.
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    curious