Dean Rivers (dean_r) wrote,
Dean Rivers

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Breaking Jamie's Heart

This is one of the first times since I've been here that I've felt less productive, and so wondered if I should write in livejournal. I then considered that maybe this is what livejournal is to me these days; a place to use when I don't want to do anything else. I write this post, before I start on tidying up what looks like a pile of boxes with clothes around them. The clothes are laundry, so that's fine - but how do you tidy up boxes?

I have done some work today, but it is work of the feeblest kind. I went to where I work and finally got them to pay me. The company uses a card system which isn't very good - especially when you lose the first card, like I did, a day into earning it.

I also took a wonderful present Meisje sent us and wrecked it within a minute. It was a wonderful soft squishy heart-shaped pillow, with one annoyance for an obsessive-compulsive: a bright white tag. I had a quick look at the tag, which had a serrated edge on it, and read 'TO BE TORN OFF BY CUSTOMER ONLY', to which I thought, "Gladly!"

After tearing the tag off and examining it closer, I found that 'TORN' was actually 'TAKEN', and that this serrated edge was actually the tag being attached to the lining.

Still, this did mean I got to attempt heart surgery. I stitched the torn hole up, sewing for the first time in a decade (though the part of tidily knotting the string away is long forgotten) and felt dim about breaking something immediately. I wonder if this could go back - we've already had drama enough after the first item we returned: we weren't sent a soft, squishy heart as was ordered, but a steam cleaning machine that nobody rated.

I remember a past of breaking presents immediately. We bought my sister some strange Spanish 'toy' after a vacation there. The toy was essentially floury dough inside a balloon-like skin. The balloon was shaped like some kind of creature, and you were able to knead and tweak the dough to give it crazy limbs. But when I touched the toy and twisted its stomach, the skin tore and the floury mixture exploded over my sister. The look on her face made it seem so amusing at the time, but I suppose it shows that I can't be trusted with presents until I'm shown how to operate them correctly.

In the meantime, Jamie has done useful things and put a lot of hard work into finding out more information regarding the next step of this process: the biometrics. With these, I am a step closer to getting a green card (my working visa) and being able to exist a little more normally here in America.

I feel bad when I work, because I'm not doing something productive back at home. I feel bad when I'm sitting at home here because Jamie's working, and so I feel like I'm being lazy. Jamie's always done the harder work in this process; the research and double-checking and organising. I'm not so good at that these days. Whatever is left to me, I don't do properly, for one reason or another. I had to call someone today to help Lois out. However, I didn't sound like a 'Lois Henry', so they didn't have time for me.

Still, at least I've got some laundry I can do - I just hope I don't manage to clog the washing machine, stopping it from letting the water out, like last time. I suppose I do have too long a beard to be considered a respectable housewife.
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