Enfieldean

dean_r


There's a storm in my teacup!

Well, in my dollar store mug.


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Initial Perspective On America
One Bright Idea
dean_r
So, I'm starting to put things into boxes. Some fond memories amongst it all. This icon comes from a picture of a lightbulb that I doodled over, while on a Virgin plane. Jamie and I flew to Glen Rock, NJ, for the first time, and they gave us this booklet, and I used it to scrawl some American factoids down.

So, not sure how interesting it is to read someone else's perspective, but anything decent in it's being written up here, and then I'm trashing the book.

"355ml vs 330ml. 591ml vs 500ml."
One of the first things I care about in America is that the bottles and cans of soda have slightly more than European cans and bottles do.

"Can I have chicken strips? I've heard they're okay." - Dialogue from IHoP, the International House of Pancakes.
(While their pancakes became internationally famous, their chicken strips were not so fortunate.)

"Nickel (5) larger in size than dime (10) - confusing notion to Brit with sizist attitude."
Because the bigger the coin is, the more it's worth... unless the material is shinier... or not shaped like a circle.

"I am not a man yet. The cat likes me because I have a 'feminine' voice."

"I didn't realise Ace of Base were continentally famous. Good for them!"

"Oral surgeon? Silly pompous dentist."

"The shower nearly killed me. I've never heard the sentence 'water pressure' before, but I understand now."

"Sunkist is very orange, and therefore I adore it."

"Jamie's dad's hands are nowhere near as crazy as the lady with the crazy eye. I win that fight."

"Combos = ♥"

"Emily's family are all pleasant - and I can amuse Dave to the point of making him fall to the floor laughing. This may be exploited further."

"I dropped half of my first New York pretzel. New York hates me."

"Dentist trip: patients converse? I'm used to the morgue-like mentality of British patients. (Is this related to the American belief that they can throw money at the problem of aging/keeping healthy, and so share 'tactics' of survival, whereas Brits know we're all doomed?)"

"Jamie needs to stop lying to dentists - 'I need six drinks to get buzzed' - and now she's so full of drugs she can barely focus. I'm pleased with myself. I've not teased her at all while she's so out of it. Am sorely tempted though."

"Jamie's top five questions while way high, after wisdom tooth removal:
5. 'How long have I been here?' 4. 'How long did it take?' 3. 'Can I drink yet?' 2. 'Where am I?' 1. 'Is it done yet?'"

"Cheesecake Factory: very apprehensive of its pretentious glitz - but really good food. Makes me want to eat out more often."
(At this point in time, I barely went out for meals, aside from fast food. Diners were a revelation to me.)

"Our bus took a diversion down one of the steepest, tightest hills I've seen for a bus to be on. We took the wing mirror clean off an SUV. People in the bus thought we were going to die and were trying to get out of the windows, it was that steep. I enjoyed the ride."

"What do I want for the second week of this trip? Silvery grey Converse and navy blue shoelaces for them."
(Way to remember why I came over, Dean. Also: I never acquired those shoes, and still haven't.)

"Dave likes the word cheesecake."

"What the hell are 'cheese fries' and why have I not found them before now?"
Later: "'Cheese Fries' are an orgy on a plate. That is all."

"Was treated like a member of the English family after a few quick visits and two dinners with them. I can see why Jamie loves this family so much."
Later: "The love and compassion this family has aspires me to be a better person, and try to love as much as they do."

"Apprehensive about meeting Goodcow. He wants to bring a video camera. Jamie has a coldsore. It cannot go well."

"It helps to be in the turnstile of the NY Subway system before you turn it, and definitely helps to be the other side before the turnstile locks up. Finally, if you mess this up, your card will not work for twenty minutes. Knowledge is power."

"Chinatown - the home of cheap tat related to animals. Does attempting to force animal-lovers to buy tat work? Also home of 'bubble tea' - 'tea' with tapioca pearls. VILE."

"Phil does not like orange-tasting things. He may become my arch-nemesis."

"'I CURSE YOU!' - an Asian 5-year-old kid cursed me for I saw him waddle. America is great."

"We found a kiddy scooter. It was ugly. We named it 'Katilin'. We took Kaitlin underground at rush time, and also by bus to Central Park."
"This trip was especially good because small kids opposite me looked at me with admiration for having such a great toy."
"Kaitlin was ridden twice in a day. Jamie says that is better than her namesake should hope for."

"Phil is a vegetarian. I left, in his house, a ham and cheese sandwich. Unintentionally. Do I tell him? I feel bad now."
"We are the modern generation, for we spent 25 minutes putting film into a camera and felt that was an achievement."
"A stranger came up to us while putting the film into the camera - he said (paraphrased) 'Photography, eh? That's cool! But what about Jesus?', to which I replied, 'I'm sorry, I'm British,' and he skulked off, because that answer defeats any question from an American."

"We had bad weather on the eleventh day of the trip. Remind me that I need to live somewhere like that."

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Ooooh, burn. Yet so true. Someday, we'll have smash brothers... some day...

sniff...

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